Timofei, this is very deep, & so well put together. You've marshaled your arguments well — yet there are other perspectives, of course. I’d like to offer one in this journal — “Chaos or Conduit into Awakening? Your Choice“— https://medium.com/@deepthink8/chaos-or-conduit-into-awakening-your-choice-b6866fdb939c

This is a radically different perspective — don’t really know how to ease you into it — but, in your study of philosophy, an open mind is a prerequisite, yes?

While we live in a world of duality — 3D — we have inner access to so much more, that I’m speechless to try to express what cannot be framed in that duality — it goes beyond. So while I’m well educated (4 degrees), I’ve moved beyond complete reliance on mind to sort thing out, bounded as it is by duality.

Your article is quite touching, really hitting home in many quite reasonable ways. Yet it finds itself in the yes/no, right/wrong, either/or box created by duality. This is not a criticism, just an invitation to step out of that box which has no real relief to offer — as you've so beautifully explored, here.