Healing Relationships — Self 1st, pt 4

“These eyes, thru which I hoped to see God, are the eyes thru which God sees me” Rainbow Eye, Youtuber

How much has your primary relationship in life shifted — the one with yourself? You’re likely sensing an internal shifting, by now. Perhaps you’re coming into self-respect, or at least a greater self-acceptance — priceless treasures, indeed. If we had to state a goal for this relationship, it would be self-love — self-Love — yet some can’t imagine that, yet.

It’s not only our relationship with the self that’s shifting. To the extent we’re really finding our way into Heart, our relationships with others are shifting, too. We find a new respect for that old adage, “You can’t give what you don’t have.” Our relationships with others bear the brand, the mark of our relationship with ourself.

We’re also coming to realize how very much externals all mirror us back, reflecting what we’ve got going on, inside. Perhaps we never really saw this before. Though we may have heard, only now do we begin to actually sense it — uncanny, for sure. What’s it all about, Alfie, indeed.


If you’re at this stage, perhaps you begin to also recognize your inner power. It’s by our internal shifting that things in our outer world begin to morph in interesting ways. We have ultimate power to both structure & control our experience of life. Notice, I didn’t say, “control life,” but rather our experience of that.

There is only one thing over which we have ultimate authority & control — the self. Period. Yet, rather than that being limiting, it turns out to be anything but. The clarity that arises in Heart is significantly morphing how we see all of life. We see new possibilities where before we only saw limitations.

Balance is key as we walk the awakening trek, but it’s a new kind of balance, not one with which we’re familiar. Where we used to think in terms of bringing balance to the external aspects of our life, we no longer see it like that. How can we, when we realize that we’re present in all of those externals — or at least that they somehow mirror us back to ourself?

No doubt we’ve also experienced some shifting in our relationships with others. We’re finding that our values have changed. We’re seeing through so many things that used to stump us, confuse or confound us. Things once seen as critically important, somehow became peripheral while we weren’t looking — or so it seems. It’s all very strange.


We begin to realize that switching from a head to a Heart perspective is a very big deal — & that there’s a price to be paid. Yet, due to this shifting in the relative importance of so many things, a price that looked exorbitant to mind is experienced as far less so, to Heart. We’ve got a different value system going on, to which we’re adapting, not in any rush.

It’s much more clear, now, that rushing is an activity of mind — we find none of it in Heart, where it doesn’t even make sense. We may note the absence of fear, as well. Things that used to frighten us to even contemplate have now been defanged, much like Alice spotting the Wizard in CS Lewis’ Through the Looking Glass. What looked so huge has now been miniaturized — we know not how.

Most of us have spent the bulk of our life feeling uncomfortable in our own skin. We’re not exactly comfortable, now, seeing so many changes, yet we’re feeling better about many things than we did, perhaps but a short time ago. Though we often slip back into mind, we’re getting more stable in at least noticing that & remembering to center back down, to re-enter Heart perspective.


How do we spot it when we slip into mind? While we generally don’t see it as it happens, we now note it by the perspective shift it entails. Any confusion, any anxiety is so different from what we sense within Heart that it becomes noticeable. We now use such feelings as an indicator that we’re back in mind, so much less comfortable than our presence in Heart. When in mind, we may even question our sanity, at times — it’s all so radically different!

Yet, we’re far ahead of where we once were, when it seemed hard to see our way out of our tangles, our challenges. Now we’re at least aware of the vastly different perspective found within Heart — so we seek that out. While it’s a bit off-putting that Heart doesn’t answer (m)any of the “how” or the “why” questions, yet there’s such a deep tranquility, there, that we’re learning to go without the answers sought by the mind.

Things that once held our riveted attention are now often seen as rather boring. Nothing calls us there, anymore. We find ourselves at a bit of a loss around how to spend our time. Our interests are shifting so we may feel a bit lost at times. Perhaps we begin to spot that those times are often when we’ve slipped back into the mind perspective — or perhaps not.

How we know we’re changing is by the gauge of our old relationships, which are also shifting in their importance to us. Not just with people, but with all of our interests, we can tell something big is happening. We may look the same in the mirror, the same to our old friends, yet we just don’t feel the same. It can be a bit frightening at times — but only to the mind. So it helps that we’re now better able to recognize the mind perspective from the one found in Heart.


We find ourselves both steady & unsteady at the same time. It’s quite strange. Yet, just as we gain our sea legs over time on a long voyage, so it is with us, now. We have times of feeling just terrible, where we can’t seem to find our way back to that centered space, no matter what we do. These, too, are eventually recognized as mind’s efforts to retain some measure of control.

It only takes centering down into Heart presence once to know that’s the place we want to stay. What we’re dealing with now is all of the old programming, coming to light as we disengage from our mind-dependent ways. What really helps is recognizing that that inner state is our natural one, ever & always present, deep within.

This is the teeter-totter state, where much of the old programming yet remains. As we recognize that all we need do is to align with Who & what we actually are — that no doing is required, that no doing is even useful — that helps. All the mind knows is doing, never just being. If we’re fully committed to awakening, no matter the cost, that also helps, as determination is a necessary ingredient.


We may — well, we likely do find that our identity, itself, is shifting. We once thought we knew ourself reasonably well, but now we realize that was a pipe dream. We’re having memory issues, as well, forgetting so many things. After a while, we realize that this is due to our NowHere focus, seeming to make both past & future pale in significance. We just don’t care, as we once did.

Now, more than ever, we don’t truly know who we are — or even what. We question everything, yet to the extent we do so from Heart focus, we’re fine with that. We no longer get our answers via thought, but more from sensing them, somehow. We don’t understand any of this, but we know by the felt sense of Heart that it’s far more real than the external world ever dreamed of being — to us.

We’re not understood by others, by those who also thought they knew us, perhaps knew us well. We have a hard time comforting them. We have less & less desire to do so, as we realize how that inevitably takes us back into mind — which understands this stuff even less. We have disappointing conversations with people, thinking to explain, to help them understand, but somehow it never works. The results are unsatisfactory, at best.

At some point we recognize that this is due to our incomplete merger with Heart. We see that it’s our mind, thinking to help others understand. We see how we’re divided, within, to whatever extent. We’re constantly making choices, only now we’re better able to recognize the feedback from life, responding to those choices.

Slowly (or quickly) we recognize that the only ones with the capacity to get what’s going on with us are those also in Heart, at least some of the time. If you’ve never experienced the depth of Heart presence, then it’s not possible for you to commune on those deep levels. We move on from certain friendships, not due to our inability to explain ourselves, but due to others’ inability to be present where we are.

At first it’s somewhat frightening, on discovering this communication barrier. We may have been a whiz with words, before, but now find ourselves somehow tongue-tied, seemingly incoherent, trying to explain our new perspectives, the depth of our sensing. We learn to talk less, to listen more — both to others, but more importantly, to what Heart is showing us in each Now.


When we read spiritual books or listen to videos, we hear it all differently, now. We begin seeing through some we previously trusted, via our new-found inner clarity. We wonder why we didn’t see this, before — it seems so darned obvious, now! Yet, there’s a new-found joy in finding others who get this stuff — who are walking this walk.

In being true to ourself, in putting our relationship with self as number one, we begin to reap the rewards. We’re stronger, now — much stronger, in ways that sometimes surprise us — yet it seems perfectly natural (when we’re in Heart). When we’re in mind, it’s almost as confusing as before, only in vastly different ways. Now we know better.

We finally recognize the vast divide between Heart & mind perspectives.

We’ve made our choice, though, & we’re committed to this ride, no matter what. What early on seemed a huge price to pay for this choice, now begins to seem less & less, Heart being so clearly more valuable to us. There are no words for what it feels like to be centered there, yet “tranquility” may come close.

We have new levels of a Peace we’ve never before known, that are clearly priceless, no matter how impossible it is to convey to anyone else. We’re brought into contact with others on the awakening trek who actually grok this stuff, who recognize where we are, what’s going on with us. These are the new currency in our life for a time, as we stabilize in our chosen journey.


There’s literally nothing in our life that isn’t touched by the changes we’ve made, that we’re making every day, now. We’ve got an inner guidance going on that is out of this world, so different it is. As we get ever better at spotting mind at work, whether in self or in others, we’re well on our way. The programming is slowly vanishing.

Again, we know not where, we know not how, we just know that it is. We find ourselves content with that, in a beautiful way. We have more grace in living, now, finding new hidden strengths, within. Our viewing & reading habits have inexorably changed. We spend more time alone, more time just being, less time in so much doing, so much activity. We may withdraw from much social contact for a while. It may be for some years, even, but we’re content to follow our Heart, no matter where it leads.

The things we do choose to read or watch we perceive on deeper levels, now. It may be something we watched long ago, but we don’t hear it the same way, now. The deeper messages are perceived. We’re seeing everywhere the difference between a life lived in The Matrix & our new clarity, our new ways. We’re now actively tuning-in to the purest Truth we can perceive, using that to help eliminate the old programming that yet remains.

By putting self first — finding our way into actual self Love — our whole life has changed, not just our relationships. We may not be aware of it, but to the extent we’ve ditched much of the old programming, we’re actually abiding more in 4D than in 3D. It might take a while to realize this, as it’s certainly nothing we’ve been taught, nothing our friends know about, but it’s the case, nonetheless.

Meditation — blogspot.com

At this point we know we’re multidimensional, even if we don’t understand how that works. We sense it, in the deep states we’ve already experienced — there’s just no way this is all of 3D. It just couldn’t be. The rules of the game have certainly changed. We may have less (mental) understanding of anything now than we ever did. Yet, what we realize is that we only thought we knew things, before.

Now that we’re seeing right through most of what we once thought we knew & well understood, that we were fooled, like the rest of humanity, to believe that way. Things once seemingly complex turn out to be so simple, when perceived from Heart perspective. It’s all rather ridiculous, but so very much fun.

We have a new joy, a new zest for life & living on planet earth.

We see through things like the cabal so easily, now. We wonder how we were ever convinced of those things we thought we knew. We can’t find it in us to be against anyone, now — one of the hardest things to try to explain. Yet, we’re wise enough now to keep our mouth shut most of the time. We know we won’t be understood, & it’s not worth coming out of our new, centered state to make the effort to help someone understand.

Many of us have already turned to journaling for the magical alchemy it provides, helping us find our way deeper, within, exposing things to us that would go unseen, absent the journaling. We’re learning to let Heart speak, ignoring what mind might like to say. We know which way Wisdom lies, & it’s not in mind, which exists in another realm, entirely.

Obviously I could go on & on with this, but it’s enough. If you’re not in Heart at least some of the time, you haven’t read this far, anyway. You get some or most of this, or you’re at least open to the possibilities, which is sufficient for any Now.

To the extent we get out of our own way, our cork will float — no doing involved.

Finally, while the awakening trek may seem a bit lonely at times, what you’ll find as you persist is that you’re actually linking-up with everyone, just in ways mind doesn’t recognize. It doesn’t have to recognize any of this, for Heart simply knows it. You’re finding yourself one with all that is, every flower, animal, person, building, planet, etc.

You live in the Heart of All That Is, as Source-in-form more & more. You recognize that. It feels really good. It’s enough. Meet you there. 😉


12:56 am, Monday 2017/10/23, 1st, Mayan day 3 Deer / Manik




Theresa-Ann Harvey on the awakening trek, seeing everything thru new eyes. Leaving the 4 university degrees & the left brain aside to discover Self as awareness

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Theresa-Ann Harvey on the awakening trek, seeing everything thru new eyes. Leaving the 4 university degrees & the left brain aside to discover Self as awareness

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