Healing Relationships — Self 1st, pt 3

9 min readOct 23, 2017


“These eyes, thru which I hoped to see God, are the eyes thru which God sees me” Rainbow Eye, Youtuber

How is it going, so far? Are you making time for yourself, to just be, to witness what you’ve got going on, there within? It’s vital, whether you yet know it or not. If you’re important enough to yourself, you’ll make a way for this quiet time.

Sometimes you’ll be called into quiet time by more of a good feeling than by any sort of pain or discomfort. Other times you’ll notice yourself getting heavy-eyed for no particular reason — or so says mind. This call comes in initially subtle ways as we learn to tune-in while paying attention to the self. To the extent that we remain outward-focused it can still happen — just a good deal slower, that’s all.

As long as the strong intent is there to make a true friend of yourself, you’re doing fine. (Remember, you’re the Dance, not the Dancer ;)


By now you’ve likely seen any number of ways you’ve been self-sabotaging, working against what’s best for you. There’s a journal coming that exposes one aspect we all find, self-blame, self-condemnation — how that looks from Heart’s view. How easy are you finding it to release such things, to let them go? Again, absent Now-presence it’s just mind, going over old territory, unable to drop its burdens.

Are you developing the knack of going down into Heart-focus whenever such things arise? You don’t have to give them any thought at all — just walk away by going deeper within. Mind will pop-up, will chime in that this is mere avoidance — but what does mind know? Mind’s programming being the source of whatever problem arises disqualifies mind from making such judgments.

This doesn’t help much for those who don’t yet know it, of course — but it’s available to us all, whenever we’re ready to be open — perhaps to even embrace it. At some point you will, but please — there’s no rush. This is all about cutting yourself loads of slack, just as you’d do with a very dear friend.

We’re forging a new relationship with self.

Shame & self-blame — the many varieties of the absence of self-acceptance — will arise for you, no matter who you are. It’s a major part of the programming we all contain. We were presented with certain standards of behavior & expected to live-up to them. Yet, with the fully programmed mind, it was all but impossible. Furthermore, if we did manage to toe the line, we did so at the expense of our relationship with self.

We get good at repression.

Do you see how you just couldn’t win — how it was a set-up, right from the beginning? It takes time spent in Heart, in our deep spaces, to see things this way, so I hope you’re making your way in, making time for yourself. No one can do this for you, so if you perceive someone or something as being in your way, that’s not coming from Heart.

You’re as empowered as you choose to be.

We didn’t know that, before, but now we begin to see it through new eyes. Heart’s perceptions are entirely other than those to which we’re accustomed— than those of mind, in other words. Heart’s standards are totally different, as well. It’s literally a whole new realm we’re dipping into at this point.


In the old ways it was far too burdensome to focus on our troubles — nor did it bring any good fruit. This is something quite different. We likely have no idea why, but that doesn’t matter. The why questions are actually on their way out, but don’t tell that to mind, lol. Poor dear, she can’t imagine living in such a world, in such a way.

While it’s quite counter-intuitive, we begin to discover that this way of befriending the self, giving it more of our time & focus, is somehow lightening our load. To the extent we’re willing to just feel our feelings, being there with whatever arises, the burdens dissolve. We know not how or why — isn’t it rather amusing? We’re so used to reliance on mind & its ways that this seems more than strange.

Thus do we become the observer of mind & its ways.

Iceberg — Cleavinger — jesuiscultive.com

Thus do we find our way into our newfound depths. It’s a truly magnificent journey, my friends. Shocking, yes — for a while. Later on, instead of shocking, it’s just surprising — delightfully so. So far I’ve found it to be a journey of never-ending surprise. Just as I get enter a new, higher or deeper level of being, along comes the next step — one I never expect.

It’s a whole new way of living, of being — one that thought cannot comprehend. Mind is seen as a secondary tool, useful at appropriate times, but soon seen as useless around things of Heart. Each one will have to discover this for the self, however. It’s nice to be aware that such things are available, yet nothing proves it to us but our own direct experience. (Nor can we prove it to anyone else.)


I go on & on in my blog, which has but a small viewership, knowing there are few who actually hear me, few taking this trek. I hope you can see how silly it would be to seek more viewers among those lost within the mind realm. To those still in The Matrix, this blog just doesn’t make sense.

Why bother when so few are ready to hear it?

Heart just laughs, knowing that the joy in the journaling is quite enough. Who sees it, who doesn’t, it just doesn’t matter — not to Heart, who lives in a whole nother world. The power of one is incalculable. Over time we come to trust Heart to know what it’s doing, relying ever less upon thought & mind, on externals.

Those in mind just can’t know — including us — & at some point we come to the direct realization. Until then it’s a bit awkward at times, but don’t be surprised to find yourself living this way, too. It’s only confusing for a while, until we get better at ignoring mind, where all confusion abides.

IQ has nothing on Heart, whose intelligence is divine, whose realm is so vast as to make our mind realm seem impossibly tiny. I know, that sounds crazy at first, as mind is amazing, in its own right, its own realm. (It’s only the programming that hems us in — the Belief Systems.) Still, this experience of the vaster beyond is available, so it’s up to each one, whether to enter or not.

You don’t come here expecting to gain anything — that’s mind’s way, entirely.

You come because you’re called, called by something as awesome as Source, as the divine. You find yourself living in and among humanity, yet set apart — from mind’s perspective. You come to know better, though, as the deep realizations roll on, taking you yet deeper, within — into the magical realm you never suspected was here, where you abide at the heart of all that is.


You don’t have to justify yourself, your path to anyone, either. Besides, try as we might, we can’t bring them along into understanding. If you think to become a teacher of this, my heads-up is —be cautious. The only way to accomplish that is to go only so far on your journey, then stop. The ever-present danger being to slip into the spiritual ego. Many do.

I’m not saying there aren’t real teachers out there — there are. Yet it’s not them doing the teaching — they’re being Danced into that. Heart will have its way with you, & you just can’t know what that will be, what it will look like. You’d have to leave the present moment, which you won’t want to do, due to your burgeoning loyalty to Heart & NowHere awareness.

Truly, my friends, we find our way — if that’s our choice — into the divine Dance. Sayings like this motto begin to be felt — “These eyes, through which I hoped to see Source, are the eyes through which Source sees me.” Or, “Drink me while I am drinking thee.” Rumi lived within Heart, as did others before & after him. They may seem crazy to the world at large, but not to us, once we touch down, within.


It’s often called “awakening,” yet I’m here to attest that it’s nothing like anyone expects. We know nothing of this until we enter into it. It’s not knowable. I hope you can see how the mind must needs be set to the side, placed in the tool belt for other, more appropriate uses. Once we rid ourselves of much of the programming that besets everyone’s mind, only then do we begin to see truly. Until then, to the extent we occupy mind, we’re programmed, as well.

Thought is perhaps our most powerful implement, being entirely creative. Thus, the energy we vest in our Belief Systems sets the bounds of our narrow world. It’s not mind, but the Belief Systems that must go. Only then do we begin to know what a pure & clear mind even is. What we’ve taken for “normal” for so long is anything but — yet who can see this, as long as they occupy the mind?

It’s akin to the whole technology situation, where we’re in process of losing our humanity to the machines. Yet who sees this? When we’re all techo-addicted it cannot be seen. It’s like asking the surgeon to operate on herself — ridiculous! Of course, it doesn’t seem that way to the mind, yet we’re learning to value its output less & less as we recognize its programmed state.

In one way we can’t see the forest for the trees, being stuck within The Matrix of the hacked mind. In another way, we’re present so deeply in everything that we’re one, right down to the minutiae. It’s both! You often find this when in Heart, whereas mind is ever left with the endless duality of either/or —never both/and. Just elements of our amazing inner realm, at work & at play.


Where are we going with this? Guess what — we don’t know. 😆 Nor do we need to know. The standards, the whole reality here is quite different, & can’t be put into words. Language, though a useful communication tool, remains linear. One letter, one word at a time; one sentence, one paragraph, one chapter, etc., using mind to decipher it all.

Heart does a better job, reading it on deeper levels.

What use is language, then? Spoken from Heart, it carries the encodements, the “spiritual” energy of the inner realm. We work & abide at the energy level underlying all things, all forms. So we find we are actually IN them, all over the place. Whatever we see, we are that.

We find Life mirroring us back to ourselves — in every way.

Source has been communing deeply with each of us, all along. We hardly noticed it, strictly due to the programming. People actually believe in the myth of coincidence — we learn to laugh at that, now that we’re getting the messages, reading the energies. Slowly, we begin to discover that literally everything holds meaning — for us — everything in our direct experience, not everything in the world. (Perhaps, were I further along on this trek, I’d realize that last phrase was false — IDK.)


It just is what it is, & we learn to take a special, deep delight in that, no matter what presents. We begin to know that all brings blessing, no matter what. This major shift in perspective is truly life-changing, friends. It puts everything “out there” (for it’s all actually within) on its head. Our old ways of seeing things fly out the window, ever faster & easier.

I hope you’ve tasted the sense that you can’t do anything wrong — that it’s all good, somehow. Also that you’re taking these things to Heart instead of mind, which won’t know what to do with them, & will only make a mess, there in your life. It’s time to more than just forgive ourselves for all perceived wrongs, all harm, & anything negative. On this trek the negatives just disappear into the realization that it was actually beautiful, all along — just not seen that way, before.

Changing perspectives is major change — that much is clear to all who find their way into Heart.

The journey is both easy & difficult by stages — yet heavenly, overall. It takes no belief in any religion, though if we choose that walk, that’s fine, too — just so we’re Heart-centered. Finally, as we come to befriend the self, begin to cut it major slack, we find ourselves doing the same for others — allowing them to have their own chosen walk through life.



7:59 am, Saturday 2017/10/21, 1st, Mayan day 1 Serpent / Chicchan




Theresa-Ann Harvey on the awakening trek, seeing everything thru new eyes. Leaving the 4 university degrees & the left brain aside to discover Self as awareness