Healing Relationships — Self 1st, pt 1

“These eyes, thru which I hoped to see God, are the eyes thru which God sees me” Rainbow Eye, Youtuber

How friendly are you with yourself, with all of you — your body, your mind, your Inner Being? What kind of a relationship is ongoing, there — you with you? For most of us, it’s not too nice, none too pleasant — yet we put a good face on it & plow ahead, spending precious little time & effort on this primary relationship. If this is ringing bells, there where you are, that’s a good sign. You’re at least open to seeing it.

Let’s not go off into the “Who or what is the self” thing, here. That’s not necessary for this. All we need “do” is get the felt sense, within — Now. Let’s not let mind get too involved, either, planning all the good things it will do to help mend the inner relationship. Those are just detours, temptations to leave the NowHere point of power.

So we go within — just be there, just sense.

What do we feel? It’s important to delve deep enough to bypass mind & thought. Not only are they not needed for this trek, they’re in the way. We’re going deeper, potentially much deeper, into the felt sense of our being. I find it helpful to center in Heart, but approach it how you will. Your way is much better than anyone else’s for this sort of work.

Some initial questions to ask while quietly centered, follow. When the response arises, be sure to ignore mind’s input to the best of your ability. It has no gravitas whatsoever in the deeper realms that we access, here. Poor dear, it just doesn’t know, & that’s uncomfortable to it, so it runs interference for a bit until it adapts. You’re in charge, there, & it helps tremendously to know that you have a mind — but that it’s not what or who you are — just a useful tool for other things.

Being Alone — debosmita.wordpress.com

Do I love myself, really Love myself, honestly & deeply?

Do I trust myself?

Am I worthy of love — am I worth loving?

These give a good basis to begin. There will be more, of course, but you’ll find yourself asking them of you — so to the extent that you’re there for yourself, perhaps you’ll listen. Know that any activity of mind cannot reach these depths, so it’s best to not attend to it, best to ignore it. Once you find your way into these deeper layers of being, mind doesn’t participate. It just watches — & learns.


Most of both our personal problems & those of society can be tracked back — not to mind, but to our over-reliance on that — our trust in it. That’s what’s out of place, & the beauty there is how that puts us in the driver’s seat, empowering us to shift & change.

At first mind will want to be in charge of what changes to make, convinced that it knows how to lead the way forward, to make things somehow better. Humanity is rather mind-addicted, at this point, so our trek is toward independence as Who we truly are, away from such deep reliance on thought & on mind. This will feel awkward at best, early on, being so new.

What, you mean I’m somehow more than my mind? You’re kidding — right?

We each grapple with such things on our own, in our own particular way. Of course we’ll slip over into mind — it can’t be helped. We’re not doing this thing cold-turkey — unless that is your way. It’s rather too abrupt for most to handle while maintaining a semblance of order in their work-a-day life. One way is not preferable over the other, so go with what FEELS best to you — not what mind thinks is best.

This whole time is about building a new relationship with you, yet on deeper levels than some have yet accessed in this lifetime. It’s about treating yourself as the most wonderful discovery, as this truly awesome being you just met — that you want to get to know on deeper, more intimate levels. It’s all about loving the self, & mind is peripheral to that.


Most of us never had a truly deep relationship with anyone. As long as we abide in mind, this depth of relationship is not possible. It means we don’t even have that relationship with ourself. Relationships, to mind, are all about others, be they people, organizations, belief systems… whatever. When we don’t visit, don’t abide on the deeper layers of our being, we’re not accessing the awesome depth available. Mind is superficial to that — do you see?

By taking ourselves as beings of thought, we choose not to enter such realms.

We’re moving, here, from thinking into sensing, into getting the felt sense of whatever it is, be it a question, a person, a relationship — anything. Where focus goes energy flows — yet to perceive it we must find a deeper center than what we’ve thus far perceived as the self. So we move from thinking into sensing, which is most often wordless. It conveys information in quite different ways, so it takes adaptation, some flexibility.

Are you with me so far? Can you shift your perspective on self to make room for this — that you’re much more, & far deeper than you may have thus far taken yourself to be? You’re better, finer, greater — what you discover will blow your socks off — yet the way in will travel some roads of pain. That’s what scares many folks away from this walk.

Just like a lover, wounded after a fight, feels hurt & unsteady with the relationship, let’s look at your relationship with you. There is some wounding there, too — only not the sort after a fight, more the sort after being long ignored. Not sought out, not consulted on many deep things, there grows a distance between self & self. As the outer self sails on, quite content to be a being of body & mind, the Inner Being goes unheeded, ignored.

This is not done intentionally, being just another aspect of the mind hack, the programming we all endured. So you have nothing for which to apologize, to make amends — it’s not like that. As soon as you touch down into the deeper being, being present to that, this is the ideal to the self — just lending it an ear, so to speak. This is what’s desired, so ignore all that’s gone before — which of course, would only be mind at work, once again thinking it knows.

Mind has no clue what it’s like to go so deeply within — what time is experienced like there, or anything else.

The most distracting aspect of the early stages of this particular journey — coming into a love relationship with the self — will be provided by the mind. This makes you way better off than I was, in my day of walking this road. At least you know, & even if it starts as a mere mental knowing, that can still provide some background support, helping you better tune-in to your Inner Being. Hey, that’s priceless stuff, that tuning-in!

Looks like this is another part 1 of a multiple journal. It does no good to get too far ahead of the self — it gets in the way of good results. How? Because mind latches onto the later stages, keeping those in mind when your focus belongs ever NowHere — nowhere else. This is not a mind journey, which for some will be a first, since that’s all that we’ve thus far known — the walk with & as mind. Even with drugs & shamanic works, if we’re only resident in mind, we’re riding on the surface of what is possible, not truly taking the deeper ride.

We’ve allowed mind to convince us of so many things — things detrimental to this deep, inner work. Hey, we didn’t know any better, so it’s best to be aware of any self-criticism or the like as it arises — & it will. We’re on a journey that will include discovering the many, almost endless ways we’ve been taught to work against the very self that we are. As we saw that others fully accepted those ways, we took them to be normal.

Normal for what? Normal for whom?

At the core of all of this is that we don’t truly know Who we are. We were never taught, but given mind stuff, the mind trek, in its place, effectively covering over our true depths. That time is over, now — to the extent you’re willing to let it be over. There’s a new way, where you’ll discover perfect self-acceptance — a rare bird in these days. What many haven’t yet realized is that it exists, already formed & perfect, just much deeper within, in areas we didn’t even know even existed.


It’s a shocking trek in many ways, so I’ll issue a word of warning, here — you will be changed by what you find, in more ways than mind can imagine, much less realize. If you are not who/what you took yourself to be, discovering your hidden depths must needs be somewhat shocking. How could it be otherwise?

So face the fears as they arise, being sure to make regular space & time to just be with you — nothing & no one else, only you. You have nothing to solve or resolve — that’s not your job, for it will be handled by Source — by you being the divine Dance, not the individual person you now take yourself to be. You are not that, but that’s forbidden ground for mind, who cannot work any of this out.

Is that shocking? Guess who is feeling, perceiving that shock. Could it be mind? Just observe. So many things will be shifting at more basic, foundational levels of your being, so much will be quite new. Since mind has been in control, perhaps this whole time, mind is more than a little frightened by this journey — it will give you a hard time.

Here’s the deal, though — you are so much more, so much wider & vaster than any mind ever dreamed of being, so you’ve got what it takes. You ARE what it takes. It’s all about allowing that to roll, to finally, oh finally have its say in your life. You will perceive change at deep, fundamental layers of your being, shifting your whole perspective on life, & in so many ways.

So be sure you’re determined to proceed. This isn’t a trek that can be taken lightly while still in mind-mode. No changes like this can occur on that level. If they could, they likely would have done so before now, yes?


Bon voyage, friends. You’re far more awesome than mind has the least clue about, so it’s a wondrous, wonderful journey, to be sure. It has its ups & downs, its challenges, but of course. Would you want any less? What if you could literally see every challenge that came your way as beneficial — as having your best intentions at heart? Wouldn’t that be so very cool?!

While it’s not possible to just adopt this as a new belief & call it done, it’s still helpful to know it as a possibility — one fully within your reach. That both expands your horizons & plants seeds of new possibility — excellent stuff! So enjoy the journey, even the challenging parts (eventually ;), doing your best to take it with MOM — Mind-Observer Mode.

In l’akesh


1:46 pm, Friday 2017/10/20, 1st, Mayan day 13 Seed / Kan




Theresa-Ann Harvey on the awakening trek, seeing everything thru new eyes. Leaving the 4 university degrees & the left brain aside to discover Self as awareness

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Theresa-Ann Harvey on the awakening trek, seeing everything thru new eyes. Leaving the 4 university degrees & the left brain aside to discover Self as awareness

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