Expectations vs Happiness

Merry Christmas

5 min readDec 25, 2017
“These eyes, thru which I hoped to see God, are the eyes thru which God sees me” Rainbow Eye, Youtuber

How happy are you? Are you at least content? Happiness is truly an inside job — no one owes it to us — nor we to them. As we begin to take ever more responsibility for our own life, our own state, a much deeper happiness can bloom than whatever we’ve known up to now.

The enemy of happiness is expectations.

Take that in, giving it a moment to settle. It doesn’t matter whether you’re expecting certain things of yourself, or more likely of others — that just doesn’t work. It’s a form of resistance, refusing to accept what is, demanding that it be somehow other. Can you see it?

Most often we expect certain things of our loved ones, our friends, our employer — certain behaviors, certain attitudes. We expect them to treat us in certain ways. We expect them to forgo certain behaviors or attitudes around us. It’s a big mess, or one in the making. As we’re doing our internal house-cleaning, expectations are easy to spot.

We know it the minute someone doesn’t please us in some way. They haven’t spoken or acted as we expected, or vice-versa. Perhaps we’ve displeased them. It will be a really great world once more or most of us realize that other people are not in charge of our emotional state, much as we might like to blame them, to take the easy way out.


It’s so much easier to point the finger at what someone has said or done as the source of our discontent than to go immediately within, seeking its internal source. This can be hard work, going so much against the way we’ve been raised, taught, & socialized as it does, but it’s worth it.

This is spiritually growing up.

We’re in a world where only the few truly take ownership of their own state, their own life. These are the strong ones who blame no one & nothing for their interior state, never lashing out. We weren’t taught to take responsibility for how we feel — far from it — but we can change that.

The rewards are so great, making it truly worth the effort, worth whatever is required to quit looking to external things to take away the pain or to blame for it. This goes along with moving into a Heart-centric mode of living. Within the internal Oneness at our core there is no two, so no blame or disappointment can arise, there — ever.

Can you even imagine that — a realm where blame & all such activities are not even possible? It probably sounds like science fiction to some, but what about you? How much blaming do you do, be it of other people or society or whatever? Blame makes no sense to Heart, believe it or not.


The cause of blame generally arises from unmet expectations. Can we let them go, releasing both ourselves & others from their awful webs? We can, of course, so the question becomes will we? Will we make that choice & make it often? It’s a great habit to develop, to cut expectations off at the pass.

One of our famous sayings could be “Happiness is an inside job.” It’s something each one needs to own. Will you be one of them? The more of us who discover this, who make the necessary internal shifts, the easier it will be for others.

It’s not possible to leave the Oneness, which is always there for us. When we’re focused on externals we cut ourselves off from Heart, from our infinite/eternal union, but it’s still there, just awaiting our return. Expectations are a form of mental poison, my friends. I hope many of us can already see this, that many already know it.


Let’s give one another the chance, the full right to be who they are. Let’s quit trying to control them, seeking our own satisfaction, thereby. That’s not the best path. As we find our way into Heart space we encounter a Love that’s unconditional. Ponder that — not one condition — freely given, no matter what we get (or don’t get) in return.

It doesn’t matter. They get to be themselves, whoever they are, to behave however they will. Rather than trying to change them, we can make choices around how & how much we associate with them. We don’t need to accept mistreatment from anyone. That’s not what I’m saying.


Above all, it’s vital to love the self/Self. Absent that, we don’t have it to give to anyone, anyway. What so many call love is just seeking to get their own needs met; it’s not the same. We need to walk tall on this awakening trek we’ve chosen. This is part of spiritually growing up.

Often, it is challenging, sometimes it seems terribly difficult. Yet, if we’ll step back for another look at that, we may see how we’re the one creating that difficulty, usually based on our unmet expectations. The mind works this way, which is quite alien to our Heart, to the Source-in-form being we are.

Wishing each & every one of us the best possible Christmas. The best gift we could ever give ourselves is to find our way into Heart. It just doesn’t get better than that. All the understanding in the world, in all of Cosmos, is accessible there.

Let’s cut everyone — including ourselves — loads of slack as we turn around, face inward, & choose to take full responsibility for everything about our life. Let’s remember that we chose this life, it wasn’t forced on us. Mind can’t access this sort of thing, but we can.

Let’s use more of MOM (Mind-Observer Mode) & less of being stuck identifying with the body-mind. That’s the smallest bit of Who we actually are. Christ consciousness is also an inside job; as He told us, “The kingdom is within.” Heart takes us there if we’re willing to take the trek.

Merry Christmas!

Milano — Wikimedia
Cosfest Christmas — DeviantArt.net



12:37 am, Monday 2017/12/25, 1st, Mayan day 1 Dob / Oc




Theresa-Ann Harvey on the awakening trek, seeing everything thru new eyes. Leaving the 4 university degrees & the left brain aside to discover Self as awareness